Yes, due to the wonders of Cable television, I have access to all kinds of great programming like the Discovery Channel (Survivor Man, Whale Wars, Deadliest Catch, Mythbusters, etc.), TLC (Jon and Kate), The Food Network, History Channel (Band of Brothers), HGTV, and more. And let’s not forget ESPN, ESPN2, ESPN Classic, and ESPNU. Who needs network TV these days?
Anyway…Courtney and I have enjoyed watching Jon and Kate Plus 8, mainly because their sextuplets were close to the same age of our oldest. They are just a little older and we could watch Jon and Kate and get a preview of where Jackson was headed. But, as many of you know, it was announced last night that Jon and Kate were officially separating and pursuing the dissolution of their marriage. Yep, it’s sad. It reminds of our recent message series we did at church called “Desperate House Lives.” It one message, we talked about how much planning, time and effort goes into the wedding. Hour upon hour, dollar upon dollar, goes into the event of the wedding. But a wedding does not a marriage make. And we talked about how happy weddings are – parties, gifts, ceremonies, gatherings. Lots of fun. Everyone loves that. But how sad is the separation and divorce on the back end? No parties. No gifts. No celebrating.
I don’t blame either Jon or Kate. I don’t know them or enough of what is happening with them. Statistically, they were destined to fail. Most marriages end in divorce. And on the show, Kate mentioned once how parents of “multiples” were even more likely than the average couple to divorce.
But here’s an observation. Particularly recently on the show, Jon and Kate have both stated repeatedly how they do everything for the kids. I’d have to go back and watch, but I’m pretty sure that is the theme of their lives since they went from 2 to 8 kids in 9 months. It’s hard not to be about the kids when you’ve got so many. And they keep saying things like, “I do it all for my kids. I only want what’s best for my kids.”
Do you want to know what is best for your kids (and mine)? That their dad loves their mom and their mom loves their dad. And that mom and dad realize that the best thing for their kids is not clothes, toys, a big house, money, etc. The best thing for their kids is that mom and dad prioritizethe health of their relationship. It’s not about the kids. It’s about mom and dad being healthy and loving in their relationship. That is what those 8 kids need. That is what my 2 kids need.
I wish I had heard on the show, “Yeah, Kate and I are getting a3 babysitters to come over so we can go out on a date night tonight. We need this. We realize that the most important thing for our kids is to show them that I love mommy first and foremost, and they come next line after my relationship with her.” And for Kate to say the same thing as Jon.
So many of Jon and Kate’s viewers are sad today. They long to see a family survive and thrive. Perhaps we could all say a prayer for them and hope that they will come to a point of humility where they learn how to love and serve each other instead of themselves, and the kids.
Once I made that list, I could then compare how I pray to these and assess my level of devotion. So, what am I devoted to? The quick list is easy to form: my wife, my kids, my job. And then there are the other obvious things that we all do with devotion – hygiene, eating, sleeping. And from there are the other individualized things we devote ourselves to. For me it would be things like softball games, watching “The Biggest Loser” when it’s in season, etc. Essentially, our devotion is measured by our loyalty. The things we do consistently are the things we are devoted to.
has invaded your space, your home. Generally, we have to make some adjustments to accommodate our guest(s).
Both are in seminary, Amanda works fulltime, and Cary works at The Bridge and at another part-time job. Wow. That is busy. They don’t have any children yet, which gave them the opportunity to do something very impractical – something all of us probably wish we would have the impracticality to do: they drove to California and back over a period of ten days! Of course, they made several touristy stops along the way, but what a valuable model of impracticality. I mean, who drives to California? For fun? That’s crazy! But what an opportunity to travel, see the USA, and spend some valuable time bonding with your spouse! “Way to Go” Cary and Amanda!
Dan and Katie are both currently jobless, but due to their apparent adeptness towards financial freedom (check out Dan’s side job – 
All of the pictures helped us to introduce the idea that we all have some stains in our lives. For good or bad, we have been “stained” by our family of origen and that is reflected in our adulthood. The Bible says, “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). In other words, whatever “training” we received in our childhood shows up in our adult years. And, if we don’t make some changes to eliminate the stains, our children are doomed to repeat the same cycle we are in as we pass the stains along to them. It’s time to break the “stain cycle.”
individuals or families can reach the point of desperation. The dreams we had envisioned for our relationships or families have taken a turn for the worse. What happened? You happened, that’s what! We are all a product of our upbringing. For good, or for bad, we were all “stained” by the environment in which we were raised. And whether we like it or not, these stains show through in our lives and relationships today. Is there hope? Can we change? Absolutely. Join us @ 
